Going in Style

2017, USA, 96 min

Director Zach Braff’s remake of the quiet, thoughtful, 1979 comedy-drama ups the cat-and-mouse maneuvers, raises the stakes and modernizes the story line. Brooklyn friends Joe (Michael Caine), Albert (Alan Arkin) and Willie (Morgan Freeman) decide to rob the mega bank that has taken their pension money, after they’ve been laid off from their longtime factory jobs. What ensues is more laugh-heavy than the original, sometimes to its disadvantage—Christopher Lloyd’s superfluous appearance as a forgetful member of the friends’ social circle is flat-out ageist, a series of worn stereotypes presented as cheap comic relief . But the main characters’ comradery and their refusal to be marginalized by society make for a pleasing, moving effort. 

Going in Style 

1979, USA, 97 min.

New York City retirees Joe (George Burns), Al (Art Carney) and Willie (Lee Strasberg) are at the point where spare time has become a burden. Their days are spent idling in the local park or in their drab apartment; excitement is treated like a dietary restriction. So when Joe casually mentions they should rob a bank—it’ll provide a dose of adrenaline and is a shrewd fiduciary strategy!—Willie and Al agree. Then reality sets in. Director Martin Brest wisely eschews easy jokes for a meditation on mortality. The robbery and its aftermath invigorate Joe but aren’t a tonic for Al and Willie, who become overwhelmed by the audacity of their act. By rejecting easy solutions for the loss of purpose that can come with aging, Brest fashions a bittersweet gem. The entire cast is game, especially Burns, who shelves his famed mugging to deliver a terrific performance

 

Living

2022, UK/Japan/Sweden, 102 min.

In early 1950s London, lifelong bureaucrat Mr. Williams (Bill Nighy), whose life is all rigid routine and almost comatose stoicism, receives a shattering diagnosis. After a couple of attempts at living life to the fullest—including a drunken, sentimental night in a seaside town—he devotes his attention to a small, crumbling, neighborhood playground. This short, bittersweet character study leans heavily on Nighy’s exquisite, Oscar-nominated performance—you can practically see the weight of buried feelings in every gesture—and the narrative shifts in Nobel Prize-winning novelist Kazuo Ishiguro’s script. But Living’s bittersweet, even rueful, message emerges. Committing the smallest act, even in the autumn of our years, can tie up many loose ends, though some matters of the heart remain heartbreakingly unresolved. Adapted from Akira Kurosawa’s Ikiru.   

 

Rocket Gibraltar

1988, USA, 99 min.

Famed poet Levi Rockwell (Burt Lancaster) hosts his large family at his palatial beach house to celebrate his 77th birthday. But as the summer visit unfolds, the travails of his adult children and their spouses dominate; they seem more excited for the party than the widowed patriarch. Levi mostly spends his time alone, napping or listening to Billie Holiday albums. His eight grandchildren (including a pre-Home Alone Macaulay Culkin) are the only ones who view Levi as a person, not as a charming, ersatz innkeeper. When the kids learn Levi’s health is failing, they scheme to give their grandfather a proper send-off, while their myopic parents amuse themselves. Lancaster’s regal performance, and the connection between the legendary actor and the kids, make this little-seen film a poignant, if not potent, reminder that a family’s elders are more than figureheads or weekend hosts. 

 

Supernova

2021, UK, 95 min.

Married couple Sam (Colin Firth) and Tusker (Stanley Tucci) take their camper through the English countryside, a pleasant distraction from the latter’s dementia diagnosis. There’s gentle bickering, visits with friends and bucolic beauty to spare. But the signs of Tusker’s decline—the inability to put on a shirt, the wandering—are impossible to ignore and cannot erase a building conflict. Tusker, a writer, knows his fate and sees no point in prolonging the inevitable; Sam wants to play the role of doting spouse, to see their relationship end at death do us part. Writer-director Harry Macqueen prefers compassion over morality in exploring the spousal caretaker-patient relationship. If a person facing a terminal illness chooses to end their life, should a loved one honor that wish or fight for more time? Sam and Tusker’s exploration of that question is poignant and even-handed, the kind of development people have every day. Viewers will be riveted by this mature love story and reminded how listening and honesty enrich every worthy relationship.

 

The Hero

2017, USA, 96 min.

Lee Hayden (Sam Elliott), 71, is coasting on the fumes of a long-dormant acting career, looking for work and biding time with his friend/pot dealer (Nick Offerman) in stoned, leisurely inertia. When he gets a troubling medical diagnosis, he looks to mend his relationship with his adult daughter (Krysten Ritter) and embarks on a romance with a much younger woman (Laura Prepon). Neither knows of his diagnosis, but Lee’s uncertain future, coupled with a sudden career resurgence, turns his stagnation into a full-fledged personal crisis. Can he revive his legacy and lean into the comfort of success or should he open himself up to the highs and lows of real-life relationships? The movie’s theme is universal, but Elliott’s empathetic, weathered performance makes us feel that weight all the more—and provides ample reason to go on Lee’s alternately somber and enlightening journey. Director and co-writer Brett Haley also directed Elliott in I’ll See You in My Dreams (2015), which comes highly recommended. 

 

Tuesdays with Morrie

1999, USA, 89 min.

Detroit sportswriter Mitch Albom’s jumbled world resets when he learns that his beloved college professor, Morrie Schwartz, is dying of ALS. Despite a frantic work schedule and a rickety personal life, Albom reconnects with the fatherly professor he hasn’t seen in 16 years. He goes a step further: traveling from Detroit to Boston every Tuesday during the professor’s old “office hours” to get lessons on “The Meaning of Life.” The younger man learns to live his best life from Schwartz, whose empathetic wisdom glows brighter as the days grow more painful. “Dying is nothing to be worried about,” Morrie advises. “Living unhappily, that’s another matter.” The made-for-TV movie veers toward the saccharine, but its good intentions and the sensitive performances of Jack Lemmon (in one of his final roles) and Hank Azaria more than atone. More importantly, Schwartz’s lessons of love, hope and learning until the very end remain timeless. Based on Albom’s 1997 memoir, which has sold more than 10 million copies and spent more than four years on the New York Times’ best-seller list.   

No Country for Old Men

2007, USA, 122 min.

Retired welder Llewelyn Moss (Josh Brolin) discovers a case filled with $2 million cash in the Texas desert. Moss grabs the money and metaphorically opens the gates of hell. He’s relentlessly pursued by monotone, bowl-cut, sporting hit man Anton Chigurh (the bone-chilling Javier Bardem), who is almost unstoppable. Moss and soon-to-retire sheriff Ed Tom Bell (Tommy Lee Jones), who’s pursuing the case, make their stand in this battle of Old West heroism over indefatigable and relentless malevolence. Director-writers Joel and Ethan Coen’s (Fargo) rollicking crime movie is also a wistful reminder: heroes get old and die; evil never lags. This indisputable meditative classic—filled with layered, pitch-perfect performances—won four Academy Awards, including Best Picture. 

Youth in Oregon

2016, USA, 105 min.

Retired physician Raymond (Frank Langella) has had enough. He’s tired of burdening his family. He’s tired of having old age chip away at his virility. And he can’t stomach the idea of another heart surgery that will barely hold off encroaching death. So, at his 80th birthday celebration, Raymond makes an announcement: he’s traveling to Oregon the next day to be euthanized. In the hope of buying time, Raymond’s harried son-in-law (Billy Crudup) agrees to drive Raymond and his boozy wife (Mary Kay Place) the 3,000 miles to his eventual resting place. What begins as an indulgence grows increasingly serious as more family members get recruited in a cross-country salvation mission. Though the tone wobbles, Langella’s sturdy, humane performance remains a balm, as does the movie’s message: no matter what stage of life you’re muddling through, fixing the present is necessary to embrace the future you desire. 

 

Elsa & Fred

2014, USA, 96 min.

Recently widowed and exhausted by life, 80-year-old Fred (Christopher Plummer) moves to a new apartment, which might as well be a tomb. His next-door neighbor is the buoyant Elsa (Shirley MacLaine), who is impetuous and prone to spinning tall tales. Fred whiles away his days reading the newspaper, basically waiting to die. Then, at Elsa’s insistence, they get to know each other. As they grow closer, a rejuvenated Fred discovers Elsa’s sad secret—and how he can give her one last memorable, cinema-inspired thrill. This charming romantic comedy provides a valuable lesson: there is no age limit for falling in love and opening ourselves to new experiences. The film’s gentle charisma, plus splendid performances by Plummer and MacLaine, allow us to forgive the excessive number of characters and the film’s frequently jumbled focus. Based on a 2005 Spanish film.  

 

The Old Man and the Sea

1958, USA, 86 min.

In pre-Castro Cuba, a battered fisherman (Spencer Tracy in an Oscar-nominated performance) still sets out to sea for work. Every day he returns, emptyhanded and exhausted, to a bed with yesterday’s newspaper as a blanket. Forget being a relic; the old man is a laughingstock among his younger, more successful peers. The cycle of boredom shatters one clear day when he catches a mammoth fish—which cannot be reeled in. For days, the old man battles the fish and the elements, his thoughts his only companion. The production values of the film itself have not aged well, but the theme of the man’s unrelenting struggle to reclaim his self-respect is timeless. The battle between man and nature is an inspiring metaphor: regardless of our age, we keep fighting. Based on Ernest Hemingway’s classic novel. 

The Leisure Seeker

2017, Italy/France, 112 min.

To the shock and consternation of their family and friends, Ella and John Spencer (Helen Mirren, Donald Sutherland) unexpectedly leave town in the Leisure Seeker, their ancient, long-retired RV. Officially, the trip from Massachusetts to Ernest Hemingway’s house in Key West is so John can visit his literary idol’s home before his faculties fade away. As the bickering couple steer through campsites and diners, the depth of their relationship emerges, as does Ella’s reason for taking a seemingly impromptu trip. The movie is a striking, bittersweet ode to living life on your own terms—even if conventional wisdom begs you to stick close to home. Sutherland and Mirren, as you would expect, are outstanding, portraying the sweet highs and combative lows of a couple who can’t stand each other but can’t bear to be apart. Even better, their portrayals serve as an endorsement for marriage and for living the golden years with unabashed dignity. Ella and John’s final chapter takes place on America’s open roads, not in the sterile orderliness of a nursing home, and that gives the movie inspirational heft. 

Death of a Salesman

1985, USA, 136 min.

This staple of high school English classes has remained relevant for decades, and with very good reason. The story is set squarely in the late 1940s/early 1950s, but the theme of regret and unfulfilled promise, and how they can fester and destroy everyone in their path, remains unchanged. Arthur Miller’s mesmerizing portrait of washed-up salesman Willy Loman’s denial-fueled breakdown—the job that’s defined his life for 63 years is over; his grown sons are confirmed losers; the present is so bleak he keeps retreating to the past—is really a battle to leave this world with a shred of impact and relevance. With Dustin Hoffman, however, the old play feels downright electric. His work as Loman is a journey through the emotional spectrum, a feat you behold in slack-jawed awe. The great actor is matched by Kate Reid as his all-knowing yet enabling wife. In early roles, John Malkovich and Stephen Lang are terrific as his wayward, hapless adult sons. There isn’t one wobbly aspect, one untrue moment, in this epic tale of small, defeated people feeling their way through their middle years.

Truman

2015, Spain/Argentina, 108 min.

Most films about terminal illness focus on the high dramatics, the withering hero finding clarity on a deathbed or lingering in a somberly lit nursing home. Here’s a special film that espouses living a full life with an unforgettable, potent dignity, and that features none of those hoary trappings. Tomás (Javier Cámara) travels from Canada to visit his old friend, Julián (Ricardo Darín), a veteran actor living in Madrid. The unannounced trip comes with a gravity both men try to downplay: Julian is dying from cancer and has stopped treatment. The two friends spend four days hanging out, a good portion of which involve finding a new home for Julian’s beloved dog, Truman. The movie’s lack of to-do is its strongest asset, as we see Julian’s last push to make his life whole, whether it’s connecting with his estranged son or admonishing an old colleague for not saying “Hello” to avoid discomfort. Throughout, Truman serves as not only a symbol for resolution but a token of love between the two men. This is a wonderful, inspirational movie, which won the Spanish equivalent of an Oscar and a slew of other international awards. It will resonate with all who have considered their mortality. In Spanish with English subtitles.

The Straight Story

1999, USA, 112 min.

A chasm, caused by slights long forgotten, separates Alvin Straight (Richard Farnsworth in an Oscar-nominated performance) and his brother, Lyle (Harry Dean Stanton). When Alvin learns that Lyle has suffered a stroke, Alvin is determined to see him, but the 73-year-old has no car and cannot see well enough anyway to drive the 350 miles. Alvin’s solution is to buy a used, 1966, John Deere tractor, hook up a wagon filled with supplies and putter along the shoulders of America’s highways. Credit director David Lynch (yes, of Blue Velvet fame) and first-time screenwriters Mary Sweeney and John Roach with crafting a movie without one easy joke about middle America. They summon the humanity in the unusual and come up with a work that is aglow with human kindness. And it is all held together by Farnsworth’s beautifully understated performance. The passage of time and heft of regret reside in his every move.

Unforgiven

1992, USA, 131 min.

This is the masterpiece that escalated Clint Eastwood’s rise into the cinematic pantheon. Struggling as a farmer, widowed with two children, long-retired gunfighter Bill Munny (Eastwood, who also directed) agrees to help a big-talking kid (Jaimz Woolvett) track down two desperados who maimed a whore. Their travels take the two men and Munny’s old friend Ned Logan (Morgan Freeman) to the town of Big Whiskey, WY, where the sheriff (Gene Hackman) wants to exercise his own brand of justice. Unforgiven is a quietly profound reflection of how life cannot bend to our will. All of our acts, even from long ago, have repercussions—and we have no control over the narrative. There’s a reason why Bill Munny does not ride into the sunset but into a blinding rainstorm. He is who he is. The same applies to us. Winner of four Oscars, including best picture.

The Shadow Box

1980, USA, 96 min.

In the California woods lies a complex of cabins where the slowly dying and their loved ones spend their remaining days, holding public therapy sessions with a somnolent-voiced interviewer. It’s a controlled, almost sterile environment that radiates calm, but emotional damage accrues. An unappreciated daughter (Melinda Dillon) hides a secret from her senile mother (Sylvia Sidney); an estranged wife (Valerie Harper) longs for the fairly acrimonious past with her now-unflappable husband (James Broderick); and a gay writer (Christopher Plummer), trying to outwrite his mortality, falls into old habits when his blowsy ex-wife (Joanne Woodward) shows up. No matter how we try to demystify death’s imminent arrival, the feelings of those left behind prevent a clean break—and this may not be a bad thing. That message is delivered with nuance and resonance in Paul Newman’s TV movie adaptation of Michael Cristofer’s play.

The Wedding Gift

1994, UK, 87 min.

A BBC original, The Wedding Gift is based on a true story about a woman faced with a terminal illness that defies medical diagnosis. Diana (Julie Walters) and Deric (Jim Broadbent), her devoted husband, have an ideal marriage: they thrive in each other’s company, they’re funny, and they enjoy their two grown children and Deric’s dotty mother. Deric has taken on the round-the-clock responsibilities of caring for Diana, resulting in the near-collapse of his lingerie business. As Diana’s condition worsens, she decides to plan her husband’s future and convinces Deric, an aspiring writer, to attend a writer’s convention. There he meets Aileen Armitage, a blind novelist to whom he is attracted. Deric’s future is set in motion. You will want to note the role of humor in this film and the ways in which characters deal with physical decline, caretaking and the end of life.

The Thing About My Folks

2005, USA, 98 min.

Written by and starring Paul Reiser, this comedic father-son adventure opens with Sam (Peter Falk) seeking out his son, Ben (played by Reiser), because Sam has discovered a note informing him that Muriel, his wife of 47 years, has left him. While Sam’s daughters and daughter-in-law begin their search for Muriel, Ben and Sam embark on a trip to upstate New York to inspect an old farmhouse that Ben wants to purchase. What begins as a day trip turns into a much longer journey, giving father and son the opportunity to explore their relationship, issues from the past, and ideas about what makes a good husband. This film is about a family who care for and support one another but also show anger and their fears.

Harold and Maude

1971, USA, 91 min.

Editor-turned-director Hal Ashby had an amazing stretch in the 1970s: The Last Detail, Shampoo, Coming Home, to name a few. Here is one of his highlights. This tender, funny and evergreen film is about a death-obsessed young man (Bud Cort) who meets a sunny, hipper-than-she-looks septuagenarian (Ruth Gordon) at a funeral, an encounter that enhances both of their lives. Gleefully devoid of pandering and “groovy old lady” tropes—see Gordon’s work in My Bodyguard (1980) for an example of the latter obnoxiousness—Harold and Maude simply chronicles a heart-warming relationship between two people. Everyone can enjoy this.

Get Low

2009, USA, Germany, Poland, 103 min.

In a sleepy Tennessee town, professional hermit Felix Bush (Robert Duvall) has been the ornery, wild-bearded embodiment of every child’s nightmare for decades. Now he’s ready to face the public by hosting his own funeral. (Yes, Bush is very much alive.) It’s not a celebration of life or a goodbye as much as it is a carnival: the residents can share their stories of Mr. Bush and even enter a raffle to win his land. As the funeral home’s employees (Bill Murray and Lucas Black) plan the much-anticipated event, it becomes clear that Bush is the one who has something to say. Get Low is more than an endearing look at a hardened old kook softening, something Duvall can do from a recliner. It shows that the past can only shackle us if we allow it to.

Mr. Holmes

2015, UK, USA, 104 min.

Bill Condon’s Mr. Holmes moves at a drip’s pace. What sounds like a condemnation is actually high praise. This beautiful drama is a profound meditation on how we live with (and evade) hard truths as we age. It has to move slowly so we can soak in every emotional turn—and savor them for later. Read more…

The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada

2005, USA/France, 121 min.

In a neglected Texas border town, a Mexican man (Julio César Cedillo) is found fatally shot in the desert, a feast for the coyotes. For most, it’s one fewer illegal immigrant. For grizzled old cowboy Pete Perkins (Tommy Lee Jones), his colleague and friend had a name: Melquiades Estrada. The overmatched sheriff (Dwight Yoakam) and the overzealous border patrol officer who pulled the trigger (Barry Pepper) don’t share that sentiment. In his quest to see Melquiades treated like a person, Pete kidnaps the border patrol officer to help him give the dead man the hometown burial he deserves. Buoyed by Chris Menges’s evocative cinematography, Jones’s effort is a quietly confident exploration of the dreary lives of lifelong outcasts and the lengths required for redemption. The outstanding ensemble cast, which features Melissa Leo, Levon Helm and January Jones, gives those ideas heft.